Return
to Question and Answers Page
Dear Arthur and Sandra:
I sorta had a question for you two. It's kinda about
white lies and such. Let me begin with an example.
Let's say that there is this guy. Let's call him Bob. By the
way, this is a totally hypothetical situation. Now Bob was
born and raised in Pennsylvania. But when Bob was 18, out
of self-defense, he kills someone. Now he took care of everything
with the cops and all but it was something that he wanted
to keep to himself for the rest of his life. He never wanted
anyone to know. Ok, now let's say that 10 years later, Bob
moves to California. No one over here knows anything about
his former life.
Ok, now let's say that 10 years later (by the way, Bob is
a Christian) while he is in California, he happens to be talking
to a friend. Well, sorta a friend. More like an acquaintance
or a semi close friend. Anyway, so he's talking to this guy
and the conversation takes some turns and bends and this guy
happens to ask him if he's ever killed anyone. See, if Bob
answers yes, his secret, that he doesn't ever want anyone
to know, will be exposed. And if he says I don't want to talk
about it or I don't want to answer the question, then the
guy basically more or less knows the answer or has a pretty
good guess at it. And if Bob says no to protect his privacy
then he ends up lying.
Ok, so my question is.......Does Bob have the "right" to lie
or is it "ok" for him to lie? You guys might be thinking that
this is a really odd question to ask, however, I find the
principle or principles very applicable to life. At least
for me anyway. I'll explain it in a second. (What's coming
up is sorta a tangent but just bear with me)......It's sorta
like that time (this refers to arthur) when you were talking
to td one time and you said something like if there were a
bunch of guys outside of the td room and they all had bats
and guns and knives and they asked you were total devotion
was meeting cuz they wanted to kill everyone...........you
would have answered I don't know or something like....they
are upstairs or whatever.......but in that case you said that
it would have been ok to "lie" cuz it was in order to save
lives right? I think that's how I remember it......I could
be wrong of course so please correct me if I am...............anyway,
so I was basically wondering if the situation with Bob constitutes
a situation where it's "ok" to lie.
The reason I ask is cuz the principles involved CAN come up
and HAVE come up in real life, at least for me. See, cuz then
ANYONE at all could ask you ANY question in the world and
just by the mere fact that they asked you the question.......you
are either forced to lie or reveal something about yourself
that you didn't really want them to know. You know what I
mean? I mean, haven't you guys ever been asked something that
you didn't want to tell to the person that was asking you?
I'm sure everyone has. Anyway, thanks for taking the time
to read this email. I hope everything is going well with you
guys. If there is ever anything that you guys need prayer
for, let me know.
Thanks for writing. It's good to hear from you. If you can,
keep us posted on how you are doing throughout the year. Before
I answer your question(s), a few words of advice on college
life: 1) Please plug into a fellowship group on campus but
don't ever let it replace church (i.e. "I went to AACF/IV/Nav's
so it's probably OK to skip church this week 'cuz I got an
exam Monday"); 2) ALWAYS go to church Sunday, unless you're
sick. That is your spiritual service of worship; 3) Please!!!
DO NOT join a fraternity - bad news all the way around; 4)
When you're alone with your girlfriend (when you get one),
keep your hands to yourself. Don't lie down together, take
naps together, and keep all clothes on and buttoned/zipped
(nearly every collegian we've known has struggled and/or fallen
here; we've seen way more lives ruined and devastated than
you know - with people you'd be shocked to know about). Please
just believe me.
Those are just a few points off the top of my head. Please
feel free to comment on them if you'd like but if you follow
them, your life will be alot smoother.
Anyway, back to your question. Well, in the case of lying
to robbers, killers, etc., yes, I do believe that it's OK,
not only OK, but it's our duty to lie if lives are immediately
at stake. God has given us the responsibility to bear truthful
witness to truthful people when truthful questions are asked
in truthful circumstances. Remember, truthful (truth not merely
defined by correct facts) intent and context must precede
truthful answers. Does that make sense? The obvious example
of this is Rahab who was numbered among the faithful. Now
keep in mind that there are extremely few circumstances in
which this exception would apply and it shouldn't be used
as precedent for taking things into one's own hands in other
matters. I, personally, haven't had occasion to "righteously
lie" in my life yet, although I did lie to Sandra about a
birthday surprise - she forgave me.
With respect to Bob and situations like that, those do not
fall into the categories of being excusable for lies. The
fact that Bob doesn't want his past blabbed all over is understandable
but the fact is he did what he did and he has to live with
the consequences, one of which is having to answer questioners
during his lifetime. If Bob is truly a Christian now, then
it sounds like a good testimony to share when the question
comes up. That is, "Yes, I have killed someone. I've had to
pay the earthly consequences with time in jail, and I'm still
paying the consequences in my soul and conscience. BUT, the
Lord did change my life and turn my direction in life around.
And now I'm doing my best to help others and serve Him, etc."
We always have the right to decline giving an answer or tell
the truth (an open life is better) but in this instance, we
don't have the right to lie. That would be giving false information
to portray yourself in a different light than you really are
(i.e. a person who's never killed when, in fact, you are a
person who has killed). That's bearing false witness.
It is true that anyone could ask you any question. That's
their prerogative. There's nothing inherently sinful about
that. If the questions are sincere, truthful answers are deserved
- either, "That's not something I'd like to discuss with you"
or "Here's the truth . . . ". Protecting false reputation
does not fall into the category that excuses lying.
This is precisely why it is so vital to know that everything
we do in life counts, not only now but later in life too.
Not only in life but in eternity. Right now counts forever.
That's why we need to think contingently. That is, what effects
will this particular action have immediately and long term;
not only in my life but in the life of others as well.
Hope that helps. Let me know what you think. God bless.
Arthur
Return to Question and Answers
Page 
